How to Know If You Would Benefit from Therapy (and If You Are Ready to Start)

As a therapist in Cary, NC, I often hear comments like:

• “It’s not that bad.”

• “I probably should talk to someone.”

• “I can’t keep doing this… but I should be able to handle it.”

There’s usually a quiet subtext underneath:

I shouldn’t need therapy.

Many women silently wonder:
Is my issue big enough? Would therapy really help me?

As both a therapist and someone who has sat in the therapy chair myself, working through my own transition into motherhood and family dynamics, I can say this clearly: therapy is not a last resort. It’s a support that many people benefit from.

Therapy is for anyone who feels stuck. For anyone who needs a space to slow down and understand why they feel the way they do. For anyone navigating a life transition, carrying resentment, battling anxiety, or quietly admitting, I don’t know what to do anymore.

You do not have to wait for a crisis. In fact, starting therapy from a place where you still have some margin often allows for deeper, steadier work. Therapy isn’t about proving things are “bad enough.” It’s about giving yourself support where you are.

Therapy Can Have Different Goals (And That Matters)

When women make those offhand comments about therapy, what I often hear underneath is fear:

• Is this weakness?

• Am I failing?

• Shouldn’t I be able to fix this myself?

The answer is no.

Women all over are seeking therapy, not because they are broken, but because they are ready to stop white-knuckling their lives.

There are many reasons people start therapy, but three common goals tend to emerge:

Processing and Healing from Past Experiences

Sometimes the patterns we struggle with today are rooted in earlier experiences: childhood dynamics, relational wounds, painful seasons that were never fully processed.

Those experiences don’t disappear just because time passes. Therapy doesn’t erase the past, but it can help you work through it in a way that no longer allows it to quietly shape your present.

Having someone walk alongside you as you unpack those layers can be transformative. Not dramatic. Not rushed. Just steady and intentional.

Making Sense of What You’re Experiencing Right Now

Other times, therapy is less about the past and more about the present.

Career burnout. A shift in identity. Relationship tension. Parenting stress. A season that feels heavier than it should.

Daily life can start to feel like something that’s just happening to you. Therapy offers a pause button. A place to step back and look at your life through a clearer lens.

Instead of jumping straight to solutions, we untangle patterns. We notice themes. We explore what’s working—and what isn’t. The goal isn’t a quick fix, it’s meaningful change that lasts.

Changing Patterns by Learning New Skills

Many of the women I work with struggle with anxiety, overfunctioning, resentment, or difficulty setting boundaries.

Often they say, “I don’t even know why I do this.”

When we sit together, we explore how those patterns once served them. Most behaviors started as something adaptive—something protective. But what once helped may now be exhausting you.

It’s incredibly hard to just stop a behavior. It’s much easier to replace it with something more aligned and authentic.

Therapy helps you identify your “autopilot” and develop new responses—ones that support the life you actually want to live.

Your Goals Help You Determine the Right Therapist

Once you begin to clarify why therapy might be helpful, the next step is finding a therapist who is a good fit.

That fit matters more than most people realize.

Therapy requires vulnerability. Feeling confident in your therapist’s ability to help—and feeling a genuine sense of connection—goes a long way in building trust and momentum.

In my Guide to Finding the Right Therapist for You in Cary, NC, I walk through this process step by step. But regardless of where you live, the principle is the same: different goals often align with different approaches.

For example:

• Skills-based approaches like CBT can be helpful for anxiety and pattern change.

• Insight-oriented work may focus more on relational dynamics and identity.

• Trauma-specific approaches like EMDR may be important for deeper healing work.

You don’t need to know all the terminology. You simply need to start by naming your struggle.

If you read a therapist’s website and feel described—that’s a good sign. A consultation can help you determine if their style and approach feel aligned with what you need.

How to Know If You’re Ready for Therapy

There isn’t a checklist that declares you officially “ready.”

Readiness doesn’t mean having everything figured out. It doesn’t mean you know exactly what you need or how to get there.

Often readiness sounds more like:

• “I can’t keep doing this the same way.”

• “Something has to change.”

• “What I’m doing isn’t working anymore.”

You may not know the solution. You may feel ambivalent. That’s allowed.

Therapy tends to work best when the decision to start is your own and when you’re open to the possibility that something could shift—even if you’re unsure how.

Some women come to a consultation knowing therapy has helped them before and they’re ready to begin again. Others are curious but uncertain. And some begin with skepticism, feeling like they’ve tried everything else.

All of those starting points are valid.

Sometimes simply beginning a conversation is enough to clarify whether therapy feels like the right next step.

What If You Wish Someone Else Would Go to Therapy?

This is one I hear often.

You see someone you love struggling. You wish they would seek support—individually or in couples therapy. You can see how their pain is affecting them… and you.

It’s incredibly hard to love someone who isn’t ready to address their own patterns.

But here is the reality: you cannot make someone go to therapy.

What you can do is choose support for yourself.

Many women reach out because they are frustrated with a spouse, parent, sibling, or colleague. In our work together, we don’t spend sessions diagnosing that person. Instead, we explore:

• Your role in the patterns

• Where resentment is building

• What boundaries might be needed

• What is yours to carry and what isn’t

When one person shifts, the system often shifts.

Therapy can provide clarity, support, and practical skills in navigating relationships that feel complicated or painful. Taking the first step yourself can create movement, even if the other person never attends a session.

Are You Ready for the Next Step?

Therapy is one option among many if you sense something needs to change.

Taking time to reflect on what is and isn’t working in your life can be powerful on its own. If therapy feels like the next right step, you don’t have to have all the answers, just a willingness to explore.

If you’re still in the early stages of considering therapy, my Guide to Finding the Right Therapist for You can help you think through the process. And if you’re ready to begin conversations, you might find my post, "Questions to Ask a Therapist Before Your First Session," helpful as well.

You don’t have to prove that things are “bad enough.”
You just have to decide that you don’t want to keep doing it alone.

Author Bio

Megan Giroux, LCSW, is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker in Cary, NC, and the founder of Megan Giroux, LLC. She specializes in anxiety treatment for professional women using Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Narrative Therapy, and Motivational Interviewing to help clients reduce overwhelm, strengthen boundaries, and reconnect with themselves. Megan provides in-person therapy at her Cary, NC office and is passionate about helping women move out of survival mode and into lives that feel sustainable and fulfilling.

Learn more about Megan and her counseling services in Cary, NC